Monday, December 28, 2009

Sobriety Sunday-

{On a Monday morning}

My friend Emily posts about a different topic each Sunday relating to sobriety. I want to, as well.


Just the thought of holidays is kinda scary to a newly sober person. At least it was to me. I had my last drink on December 16th, meaning Christmas, then New Year's was looming straight ahead. I made it thru Christmas at my parents house with the help of some anti anxiety medicine the doctor prescribed me to start the journey to sobriety. {That is whole other post, my fear of replacing one drug with another}

Then came New Year's Eve. I have spent New Year's Eve in any number of ways over the years. But they all had one thing in common. I drank. Once a glass of champagne when I was pregnant and once 12 shots at the shot bar when I was 19.

To me New Year's Eve = partying. Partying = drinking. Drinking = a good time. Not drinking = boring time. By the grace of God I have learned that fun can be had without alcohol. But I had to learn that.

Over time.

One sober event at a time.

Last New Year's Eve the mister and I went to a friend's house to play games. There were at least 25 people there, all of whom I knew. I went into it a bit apprehensive, but also hopeful. I looked around and some folks were drinking beer, but most were drinking something nonalcoholic. The evening went on and I had fun. The game was raucous and there was lots of laughter.

...Granted, my husband and another youngish guy laughed louder once their beer took effect....

But no one got sloppy. No one passed out. No one offered shots. Right before midnight someone opened a bottle of champagne and a bottle of sparkling grape juice. No one noticed which glass I took. Of course, I noticed what everyone else was drinking, but I think that can be expected of an alcoholic 15 days sober.

We toasted, kissed our SOs and bid good night.

I did it! I had honestly had a good time without a social lubricant. Which 5 hours or so before I wasn't sure was possible. Thank you, Jesus!

I am still retraining my brain. I was taught, by modeling, while growing up that alcohol is just a given at most every event. In fact, I can't think of a time my nuclear family wouldn't think alcohol was ok. I now know that the whole world doesn't operate that way. Some people choose not to drink at all for no other reason than they don't care to. And that some people drink wine with dinner sometimes, have beer some weekends, celebrate with a toast on occasion. I also know that can't be me. I am an alcoholic and there are no some times for me.

It still surprises me when I go somewhere socially and there isn't alcohol and it isn't a church function. But I'm learning.

One sober event at a time.

Happy Monday~

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