Tuesday, July 6, 2010

Ten Things I FEEL Now

Like many of you, I drank when I wanted to feel numb. To feel nothing. These last 18 months have been full of feelings. Some good. Some bad.

Here are 10 things I have felt while sober

*Uncomfortable- especially in social situations when I know no one
*Relieved - when I wake up in the morning without guilt or remorse
*Sad- especially in the beginning, thinking I would never again feel a buzz
*Exhilarated- when I worked step 4 and 5!
*Aggravated - OFTEN as the mother of young children....a prime reason I drank daily!
*Surprised - This weekend when my mom acknowledged the fact I hadn't drank in over 18 months
*Proud- When I got my 1 yr chip
*Scared- when I stood before my home group and I said "I'm an alcoholic" for the first time
*Frustrated- as my mister and I figure out how his drinking will look in our lives
*Hopeful- as I venture into helping other women who struggle as I do. I hugged another alcoholic today and told her she would be fine. And I believe it!

How are YOU feeling today?
there IS hope~


Em said...

I have felt sad, frustrated, burnt out and damaged. But I have also felt loved, proud, hopeful, accomplished, and alive. I love your ten on Tuesday :)

Kim A. said...

Not being able to process and deal with feelings is part of what led me to Alanon. They all pass..I just have to keep one foot in front of the other at times. Great post today.